Bad at golf jokes

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Bad Golf Jokes Overview.

Bad at golf jokes. A man will spend 5 minutes looking for the lost golf ball. The other day I was playing golf and I hit two of my best balls. I stepped on a rake.

What do you call a blonde golfer with an IQ of 125. What do golf and sex have in common. Theyre two things you can enjoy even if youre bad at both of them.

Golf can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies obscured by the occasional miracle. Golf is harder than baseball in golf you have to play your foul balls. If you do find that you do not mind playing golf in the rain the snow even during a hurricane heres a valuable tip.

Your life is in trouble. I took up golf just so I could be useless on weekends too. A man goes to a clairvoyant who says I see lots of sand trees and water.

You must be a bad golfer. Luke Skywalker takes out his light saber on the green and says to the golfers May The Course Be With You Boom Boom. A bad golfer goes smack shit however a bad skydiver goes shit smack A man was practising at the range working on his swing.

A retired golf pro was sitting there and started offering him advice you are standing too close the ball. The man adjusts his stance and takes another swing. The golf pro looks up to him and repeats the same thing.

What is the difference between golf and sex. A bad hole wont get you a slap across the face when you play golf. Bob and John have just finished an arduous round of Golf.

Bob says John you didnt seem the same on the course today. Is everything alright at home Not really says Bob. Bad day at the course a man tells his wife.

Fred had a heart attack on the third hole. Thats terrible she says. Youre telling me the husband replies.

All day long it was hit the ball drag Fred. Babe Ruth once said It took me seventeen years to get 3000 hits in baseball. Your golf game is so bad you had to re grip your ball retriever -You should always try before you buy especially when buying a putter.

Never buy a putter until youve seen how well you can throw it. -The problem with your golf game is that you are standing too close to the ball after youve hit it. Here are some more great golf jokes anyone will enjoy.

You spend too much time thinking about golf. Do you even remember the day we got married. Of course I do.

It was the same day I sank that 45-foot putt. What is a golfers worst nightmare. When is it too wet to play golf.

When your golf cart capsizes. The 19th hole. If a bird shts on your golf cart do not ever take her golfing again.

Grizzly bear droppings have small bells golf-gloves sunglasses and other similar golf items in them and they usually smell like pepper spray. A young golfer was playing in. What do you call a blonde at a golf course.

They are the two things you can thoroughly enjoy even though you are really bad at them. If you think its hard to meet new people pick. Golf Game Jokes Taking a lesson because her golf game had been going so badly a woman had just started her first round when she was stung by a bee.

Distraught and rather angry and disheartened she went back into the clubhouse and told the golf pro about the incident. Golf Jokes Golf quotes. Drive for show Putt for dough Shank for comic relief.

Golf is a game where the ball lies poorly and the players well. Real golfers know how to count over five when they have a bad hole. Real golfers dont miss putts they get robbed.

A pretty terrible golfer was playing a round of golf for which he had hired a caddie. The round proved to be somewhat tortuous for the caddie to watch and he was getting a bit exasperated by the poor play of his employer. The Voice from the Clubhouse.

It was a sunny Saturday morning a little before 8 am I was on the first hole at The Oaks of St. George Golf Club and beginning my pre-shot routine when a piercing voice came over the clubhouse loudspeaker. Would the gentleman on the womans tee back up to the mens tee please.

Golf was once a rich mans sport but now it has millions of poor players 65. Golf balls are like eggs. Theyre white sold by the dozen and a week later you have to buy some more 66.

Theres no game like golf. You go out with three friends play eighteen holes and return with three enemies Golf Jokes for Mixed Company. Corny Golf Jokes.

A gushy reporter told Phil Michelson You are spectacular your name is synonymous with the game of golf. You really know your way around the course. Whats your secret Michelson replied The holes are numbered.

A young man and a priest are playing together. At a short par-3 the priest asks What are you. The Worlds Greatest Golf Jokes.

The Montana State Department of Fish and Wildlife is advising golfers to take extra precautions and be on the alert for bears while playing on Gallatin Helena and Lewis and Clark National Forests golf courses. The groups ahead of them was playing slow terrible golf and werent gesturing for a play. Bad Golf Jokes Overview.

Based on the popularity of sites offering fitness service Golfaq has been taking the best ones to our sites as a recommendation for the search bad golf jokes. There are 20 results for the search now. These sites have gone through a meticulous and careful selection process.

My golf game is so bad I had to have my ball retriever regripped. Im sick and tired of your obsession with golf. Why is it driving a wedge between us.

Welcome to Great Golf Jokes. Great Golf Jokes are the material for our One-Man Acts on the Golf Course and at the 19th Hole - and we can all use more of that. So in that spirit we offer the 124 Great Jokes to be found in the table below.

Just click on each link and it will take you to that joke. But dont worry there is a.