You are so old that when you pass away there will be a worldwide race between paleontologists to dig you up. You always feel like you have to pee.
I put my granddaughter tea in the morning.
Old person jokes. Following is our collection of funny Old People jokes. There are some old people ancient jokes no one knows to tell your friends and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers or where the setup is the punchline.
We hope you will find these old people steve puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh. Laughing can make you live longer. Read up on our old age jokes and getting old jokes to live forever.
Getting old doesnt have to be sad. Make fun of those grey hairs with. An old man and an old woman were sitting together on their front porch.
You used to sit closer to me said the woman. So the man moved closer. You used to put your arm around me So the man put his arm around her.
You used to nibble on my ear Let me get my teeth Great old people jokes. Even if youre not on board with the notion that getting old is awesome youll laugh out loud at these super funny old person jokes. This collection of the funniest old people jokes is some guaranteed knee-slapping fun.
These good old people jokes are perfect for the entire family especially grandma and grandpa. So wake them up from their mid-day nap explain the Internet to them for the fiftieth time and check out this list of funny old man jokes. An elderly lady went to the pharmacy.
Give me my medicine for migraines. These blue pack with a white line. Dont you know what it is.
It is family panning medicine. Then old lady answers. I put my granddaughter tea in the morning.
So that my head does not hurt all day Old People Jokes. Sixty is the worst age to be said the 60-year-old. You always feel like you have to pee.
And most of the time you stand at the toilet and nothing comes out Ah thats nothin said the 70-year-old. When youre seventy you cant even crap anymore. The old folks home was very secure.
Each door was guarded by a century. You may be old but I dont carrot all. Only old people watch the Grammy Awards.
The old baker understands aging shes an old tarte. You know what the young chicken said the old Youre no spring chicken Age got muffin on you. Funny jokes for seniors youll definitely laugh at.
Old people love My grandma rubbed butter on granddads feet when he was ill. He went downhill fast after that. A couple in an old peoples home were having an argument Margaret found out Egbert had been cheating.
Egbert did love a handjob. Two old people a man and a woman walk into a hospital. The doctor says to the old man Ill need a urine sample a feces sample and a blood sample The old man says What So the doctor says it again.
Once again the old man says what So the doctor yells. You know you are old when you realize old age doesnt last that long. You know you are old when you can relate to the Seven Dwarfs of Old Age.
Nappy Wrinkly Squinty Rocky Saggy Leaky and Farty. You know you are old when you have to buy super-sized alphabet soup. 10 Jokes for Old Timers Older Folks and Senior Citizens Posted in Funnp Jokes by admin It is a general thinking that with age the humor decreases and a person become more serious or in fact stubborn.
The nurse came out to congratulate the fellow. How do you do it at your age He answered Youve got to keep that old motor running The following year she gave birth again. The same nurse said You really are amazing.
How do you do it He again said Youve got to keep the old motor running The same thing happened the next year. A grizzled old man was eating in a truck stop when three Hells Angels bikers walked in. The first walked up to the old man pushed his cigarette into the old mans pie and then took a seat at the counter.
The second walked up to the old man spit into the old mans milk and then he took a seat at the counter. The jokes are in order of votes the best Old People Jokes first. An old couple were sitting in their living room on a Sunday morning watching a religious program.
The preacher on this show would go to all the people in the audience and asking them what they wanted fixed then he would have them cover the part of their body they wanted fixed. 440 Old people jokes ideas bones funny jokes funny quotes. I know some women whose tits hang that low.
The best old people jokes. There was an old man who always rode his bike to his brothers house every weekend. It took him 2 hours and he always made it by there by 2PM.
One day he tried to make it in 1 hour. Collapsing on a hill from exhaustion while sitting there a. This entry was posted in Dirty Jokes Idiot Jokes and tagged Adult Jokes bowl church condom latex Old Person Jokes organ pastor Priest on November 13 2012 by Joker.
A Rusty Poke The old man in his mid-eighties struggles to get up from the couch then starts putting on his coat. Old people have so much life experience that they sometimes say or do weird things. They have tried all the things they wanted to and do not give a shit about anybody else.
These old people paint a comical picture about their life with their words. Although they are funny there is a bit truth in them all everybody can learn. Youre So Old Jokes Youre so old that you owe Moses a dollar.
Youre so old that your tax file number is 1. Youre so old that you voted for god. You are so old that when you pass away there will be a worldwide race between paleontologists to dig you up.
Youre so old that if someone. Do people sleep more soundly as they get older. Yes but its usually in the afternoon.
Where should old people look for glasses. Perks Of Being Over The Hill. There is nothing left anymore to learn the hard way.
Things that you buy now wont wear out. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to a manageable size. Enjoy our funny cartoons old people jokes and clean senior humor.
Want even more old-age humor. Check out our Best Senior Jokes Book our Corny Senior Joke Book or our Best New Jokes Compilation. Remember laughter is the best medicine.
Gut Busters and Belly Laughs. Jokes for Seniors Boomers and Anyone.