What do you get if you mix ducks with fireworks. This is no regular dog he can talk Listen pal says the bartender.
What do you get when you cross a pig and a tortoise.
What do you call a turtle with a tattoo joke. I went into a book store to ask if they had any books about turtles. The cashier asked hardback. I said yeah and little heads.
My favourite teacher at school was Mrs. Strange name but she TORTOISE well. What does a turtle do on its birthday.
What kind of photos does a turtle take. Why is turtle wax so expensive. Because their ears are so small.
Where do you send turtles who commit crimes. What do you call a turtle with 6 feet. 3 turtles named Joe Jeff and Jimmy decide to go on a picnic.
They pack chips sandwiches and soda and start to walk to their picnic area. The spot is 5 miles away and it takes the turtles 10 full days to get there. You shell out a lot of money.
What do you call a sea turtle that flies. What do you get when you cross a pig and a tortoise. What does a turtle need to ride a bike.
. If you enjoyed this page you may also like. The little turtle persisted again and again while a couple of birds sitting at the edge of a branch watched the turtle with pain.
Suddenly the female bird says to the male Dear I think its time to tell our little turtle he is adopted. The bartender says You cant bring that dog in here You dont understand says the man. This is no regular dog he can talk Listen pal says the bartender.
If that dog can talk Ill give you a hundred bucks. The man puts the dog on a stool and asks him Whats on top of a house. Exclaimed the lion who seeing that the furious elephant is about to step on the tortoise kills the elephant with his claws.
By now everyone wants to murder the tortoise but nobody dares move. Now its your turn tiger orders the lion. Surviving Life with Kids has jokes for kids of every age.
Dad jokes are just a byproduct. What Do You Call a Turtle That Does Yoga. Sure joke tattoos are equally moronic but at least they approach self-awareness instead of diluting the profundity of a famous saying by weaving it into the skin of some hung-over Kinkos employee.
Heres a quote for you. Actually if somebody gets that done they will be my hero. Whether youre travelling by train or plane we have the perfect jokes for every journey.
If youre travelling by car we really hope you dont get stuck in traffic and end up crawling but if you do this collection of funny snail jokes will keep the whole familys spirits up. Uniting all Americans to ensure wildlife thrive in a rapidly changing world. PO Box 1583 Merrifield VA 22116-1583.
Jim asks the dude with the turtle how did you get all of that money there The man replies I have the fastest tortoise in the world nobodys pet can beat him in a race Jim replies I bet my dog is faster than your turtle I bet you a hundred dollars he can beat your turtle to the wall on the other side of the room. What do turtles do when one of them has a birthday They have shell-a-bration. Birthday Jokes Why did the turtle cross the road To get to the shell station.
What do you call a turtle with 6 feet A 6-foot turtle. Biology Jokes for Kids What does a turtle do during winter Sit by the fire and worm himself up. Winter Jokes Turtle Jokes.
A Couple Of My Friends Tried To Steal A Statue Las. Which App Do Pedophiles Use To Count Their Steps T. A Teacher Is Teaching A Class At My Grandpas Funeral My Mother Called Me A sha.
Im not sure youre the right man to lead the country after me. I dont know if the people will follow you Stalin responds. Dont worry Vladimir Ilyich.
Half of the country will follow me and the other half will follow you. Jin means jokes and memes. Of course a Jin joke immediately explodes.
You are the most famous turtle in the world right now what do you call a famous turtle Jin again. Shellebrity Youre amazing Jin. Congratulations again on your nephew.
Where do you find a turtle with no legs. Right where you left it. Where do you find a tortoise with no legs.
Where you left it. Where can you find a good lawyer. Vinnie and a friend were driving somewhere on Long Island NY.
They came to an intersection where they wanted to make a left turn. What do you call a pretty woman on the arm of a musician. Humpty Dumpty had a great fall And a pretty good spring and summer too.
Whats black and white and eats like a horse. What do you call a fish with no eyes. It doesnt even matter.
What do a banana and a helicopter have in common. What do you get if you mix ducks with fireworks. At what time do ducks wake up.
What do you call a duck that steals. What do you get when you put six ducks in a box. What did the duck detective say to his partner.
What did the duck say when the waiter brought the check. What do you see when a duck bends over. 36 Jokes About Ninjas Because We Love You And We Also Love Ninjas.
Theyll make you laugh. BLOOMimage via Getty Images. Not much explanation is needed here.
We all love them even though they mean to kill us. And we all love laughing at jokes. How do you know when a bass player and drummer are at your front door.
The knocking is out of time and they dont know when to come in. What do you call the drummer that just broke up with his girlfriend. What did the drummer name his children.